What is my family's story about happiness?
I wouldn't say I come from a happy family. Everyone seems to go about life in a daze, just putting one foot in front of the other to get to a destination called happiness. Their idea of happiness is something you can buy with money or that you earn after you work hard for 35 years. Happiness is not something in the forefront of my parents' minds...It's kind of an afterthought. They're just going through the motions. I would say that instead of happiness, financial security, material goods, and work are more important to them. My family's attitude is more pessimistic than optimistic. People are always being discouraged and told about what could go wrong if they try something new. The ways that my family express their joy are through playing games, laughing, talking, and watching TV, though these occasions are extremely rare. The roles played in my family are like this...My dad has always been the financial backbone, bad cop, and embarrassment (up until recently). My mom has always been meek, submissive, good cop, not a huge contributer to much of anything. My brother used to be the family entertainer/clown, but now he has faded away and lives in the background; he's been staying out of the family issues and even good times for several years now. I believe that I have always been quietly courageous; if I see things falling apart, I try to pick up the pieces. I sacrifice myself and my happiness in an attempt to assuage everyone else. I'm the caregiver, the martyr, the glue that holds the family together. Just recently I've started working on my own self instead of worrying so much about everyone else; I'm trying to allow myself to just be happy. My family's philosophy about happiness would probably be something like: Happiness is something you buy or earn, far out in the distant future, that you can acquire by working hard enough and sacrificing enough.
What is your mother's definition of happiness? She would define happiness as being content with how life is, as well as money and material goods. My mother is happiest when she gets out of work and knows she can sit and relax.
What is your father's definition of happiness? He would probably describe happiness as something you get after working hard, sacrificing, and making money. My father is happiest when he is talking about something he is passionate or knowledgeable about.
Who is the happiest member of your family, and what has this person taught you about happiness? I would have to say that the happiest members of my family are my two cats. They are happy because they are being themselves, doing what feels good to them at the time, and not caring what anyone thinks.
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